EDMO! (Central)

Whales eat too many fish!
these cockroaches, this selfish infestation
they take all the fish from us,
we need that fish.
it is no longer necessary to protect them,
like countless indigenous minorities
we’ve been too kind for too long
it’s reverse racism
discriminating against noble, struggling fish
just so these delicious thieves can clog up the oceans
bumping into ships and generally being a nuisance
I can’t remember the last time I tried to go for a swim
and wasn’t bothered by excess whales and whale related paraphernalia
and we all know they make good soup, we all know it
I hope someone goes after the lazy pandas next

This whole sex thing creeps you out
but only when you really think about it
Mostly you only think about it at a surface level
boobs, liquids, no relation to procreation
But when you stink of it in the morning,
or when someone’s bawdy comment fails to titillate
and just makes you feel a bit sick and lonely
It’s very easy to decide that people are monsters
And we should stop touching each other

Talking to my dad on the phone
and he sounded kind of snuffly,
I kept waiting for him
to tell me that my grandad had died.
But he didn’t,
my grandad hadn’t died
My dad was just snuffly

Originally published in Makeshift Magazine #2 ‘Where Are We Going?’

Written by me, designed by myself and Zena Kitson

Close book, eyes, turn off car radio
Wait for her to walk up, don’t make eye contact until she wants to
Because it’s clear before she says it, anything,
Before she gets in the door that you nudge open for her
That it didn’t happen
And no matter what she says now or previously
She really wanted it to

Originally published in Makeshift Magazine #3 ‘Look!’